Fibromyalgia Women: Learning to love yourself again v.1

Self-love Saturday: A date night with myself 

I have decided to write a blog series about falling back in love with yourself again. An extensive bathe in the pond of self-love so this will be the first in that series.

Admittedly I like who I am as a woman, I made the jump into the self-love movement many years ago after a toxic marriage but my self-love still takes a beating often and I forget who I am. I really do believe at some stage every woman must feel like this and we must learn to love ourselves all over again.

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire 
universe, deserve your love and affection”


We can have long periods of being solid, shimmying our way through our day living the best possible life content in our own little bubble. Then something happens, it can be a large event like a relationship breakdown, a new diagnosis or it can be something quite simple like seeing an old photograph of the person we once were and we suddenly forget to love the woman we are on that day.

With Autumn in all her beautiful glory and Winter fast approaching the impact in symptoms can be quite severe, well it was for me anyway.

Sunshine Fibromyalgia good days can be quite misleading especially if they come in a large cluster as we can forget all about self-care. Often we say the self-love crown, "you sit there, I am okay now, I am strong enough as a woman" and we run like little Forrest Gump snapping the callipers from our legs to grab life with both hands and place a huge kiss upon it. Fibromyalgia becomes the bullies throwing stones at us and so we run and run and run with our good days..

I know most of my Fibro Sisters struggle with seasonal change also, we can only keep on running so far as little Forrest Gump and then we have to relearn all we know.

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassions, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” 
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

So let's start we a massive dose of self-loving. 

This is my weekend, you can follow mine or do your own date with yourself.

My pamper routine began last night. I am milking this self-love for all it is worth this weekend. 
Last night it was facemask, lovely chippy tea (Take away curry and fries if you are in the US) and then settled down to watch a film on Netflix with my sons. 

It was such a great film choice for this weekend as it was all about making the most of your day, the small precious moments. I would go so far as to say it is my favourite film I have watched in 2018. Here is a trailer for it, if you have Netflix it is called "About Time". 

Saturday I woke to feel a bit is allowed but it was not going to stop me in my pursuit of happiness today. Pain medication, lots of water and lots of fruit. I then went out for a little walk to the shops to buy myself some flowers.

Why as women do we wait to receive flowers as a gift from an admirer?

I made a promise to myself long ago that I would always buy myself fresh flowers. They are on my compulsory happiness list and I deserve a couple of pounds each week.

Today's flowers were a bunch of burnt orange roses from Marks and Spencer and cost £4.

Shower time and I was already exhausted. The warmth of the shower was just what I needed and I used some of my favourite Fay Farm CBD products. 

Snug as a bug in a rug in my favourite teal lounging suit (can't work out if they are pyjamas or a tracksuit) with my rollers in. 

Got to look good for my date tonight!

Got my beautiful roses in a vase, a lovely new Yankee Candle ready to light when it gets darker, some pistachios nuts in a pretty bowl and two gin and tonics chilling in the fridge ready for this evening.

My plan is to get a freshly laundered blanket and claim the couch. I no longer have Facebook or Twitter on my telephone so they can't bother me and I do not have the notifications turned on for Instagram.

My evening will be social media free.

When was the last time you dated yourself?

Some things may be equally essential but nothing is more important than a healthy sense of self-esteem and loving yourself. My evening has not cost me much at all and I do feel special already.

“Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self-worth. Only you can be responsible for that.
If you can’t love and respect yourself – no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are – completely; the good and the bad – and make changes as YOU see fit – not because you think someone else wants you to be different.” Stacey Charter

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Love and gentle hugs

Ness xx

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