Sunday thoughts from a Fibromyalgia mind #11

"We can never judge the lives of others because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path."

~Paulo Coelho  

A strange week yet very enlightening. May is a month I detest due to many reasons. Healed wounds become raw again and I have to deal with the emotions. 

In a bizarre twist of fate the month that I detest also gave me one of the most beautiful things in my life, my youngest. Mr 10 is now Mr 11, how did my baby grow so fast? 

We celebrated with a trip to the cinema and also the trampoline park. Usually, this would result in a flare for me yet I have started a new course of management and I am so happy to report I am feeling WONDERFUL. 

I realise lately that I had stopped living. Although living within the moment, Be Here Now mindfulness is an amazing way to live as you create harmony and balance, I miss the thrill of life, the uncertainty of the unknown and all the wonderful moments of being a woman alive.  

I feel scared that the security bubble will form over me and seal too tight.

The only way to make a change in life is to take the first steps and that is what I have been doing. I will tell you more about my changes soon, fingers crossed the momentum remains. I am in "no mans land" at the moment wondering how long this will last so I don't want to tempt fate yet. 

Here are a collection of the photos from my phone for the days gone by.  

Lots of crystal healing, Nag Champa burnings and seeking inner peace. 

Beautiful flowers in gardens make me smile. 

Bluebells are the most perfect flower. 

Slightly erotic plants in Tesco Supermarket made me smile.

Mr 11 loves Pug cakes for his special birthday. 

Birthday banners for my baby. 

Trampoline park fun. 

A very tired little boy at the end of his birthday celebrations. 

Graveyards are such a great place for calm and contemplation. 

I went to talk to my son's father and tell him what we have been doing. 

Leaving your mark in life. 
....and that has been my May so far. 
May always needs extra love and I am going to learn to love this month if it kills me. My past is my past, it made me who I am. I have no regrets and I wouldn't change a thing, I just do not live there anymore. 

Onwards and upwards Ness....

 Love and gentle hugs to you all


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